3rd Place Winner - Fail To Remember

 Fail To Remember

The Detective Stutter Series
Book One

By

S.D. Tracy Harper

ALSO BY SD TRACY HARPER
SHORT STORIES FROM THE HEART SERIES
Reality’s Exit

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED SERIES
{Novellas}
I’m Not Perfect
Before We Met in Bed
The Photo
Fortuitous Luck
A Funny Thing Happened

Fail To Remember

By

S.D. Tracy Harper

Copyright © 2009, Steven D.T. Harper. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical except for the purpose of reviewing or promotion.  Fail To Remember, Book One of the Detective Stutter Series by: SD Tracy Harper is a work of fiction, any resemblance between the characters and actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Cover illustration by S.D. Tracy Harper.

Acknowledgement

      JoLynn, and Cynthia, Thank you for helping me bring Stutter to life and making this dream a reality. Without your love, support, and laughing behind my back so I could work harder to give more than my all. And of course, not for wring my neck while following my storylines.

Dedication

This book is dedicated to my friends who laughed at my jokes behind my back and said I wasn’t that funny to my face, or was it the other way around? SD.

Contents

            Prologue                                                      

1.          Stud                                                               

2.          My House my Rules                                       

3.          The Old Ball And Gold Chain                    

4.          My Boyfriend                                                           

5.          Warm Welcome                                             

6.          No Ones Pet Part One                                 

7.          No Ones Pet Part Two                                 

8.          The Perfect Nightmare                               

9.          Friend To Spend The Weekend                    

10.        Unacceptable                                                           

11.        Shake it Baby Shake it                                  

12.        Fire Sale                                                        

13.        Please Stand By                                            

14.        By Special Invitation                                    

15.        Casino Night Nightmare                             

16.        Return of the Queen                                               

17.        Mystical High                                               

18.        Flip the Script                                               

19.        I Care                                                             

20.        Visible Invisibility                                         

21.        A Long Overdue Conversation                  

22.        Didn’t See It Coming                                    

23.        A Smile in Triumph                                        

Excerpt From Book 2 ; Fail To Forget
connect with SD Tracy Harper

PROLOGUE: All That’s Remains

     

He shook his head in grief-stricken disbelief and wondered how in the hell did he end up in his current situation. Sitting before him was several case files, a half bottle of thirty-year-old scotch, and a very expensive empty glass. The room he was sitting in had once contained a multibillion dollar collection of paintings, rare statues, and sitting on individual pedestals and under protective glass were crystal figurines and vases. These items were so expensive that museums would have trouble insuring them. Only a table size desk and two thrones like custom made chairs remained within the room.

     The chair he was sitting in was made especially for him and the other belonged to… someone he never thought would occupy a permanent place within his heart. It both surprised him and gave him a sense of peace how easily they had walked boldly into his life and remained as if they had always been together. Now that particular chair, their chair, sat in the corner of the sitting room. It was one of the saddest days of his life when he had covered it with a black cloth and would on occasion think about how it would never to be used again.

     He never liked the thought of a sitting room. To him, it was still part of the bedroom and not the sort of place to hold a conversation with someone who wasn’t sharing the same bed with you. But, here he was, in a room larger than his old apartment, behind a desk that belonged in a museum, drinking thirty-year-old scotch out of a glass that cost more than his yearly salary, and wondering how the hell he ended up there. The only sound that was heard was that of snoring coming from the bedroom.

     That and that alone, had brought a small upturn to the corner of his mouth. As annoying a sound of this kind would cause some to plug their ears with whatever was handy, like a bullet newly warm from the gun it was fired from, he was on the other end of that spectrum. He was always a sound sleeper and had a very long list of things that were ranked much higher than a nose violin. He poured himself another drink and picked up the first of the eight case files sitting in front of him.

     He was always grateful when the pictures of the victims were removed before he opened a case file assigned to him. These cases weren’t assigned to anyone and never will be. Each of these eight folders was that of a murder and each of these murders were destined to remain unassigned and unsolved. Of the eight lives lost, only one of them didn’t end in a bloody mess. This was the case file he was currently reviewing. No matter how he would like for the information before him to change, the one missing piece to solving this puzzle and clearly linked each of these cases together was so simple even a child could point out. Unfortunately for him, he was that missing piece.

     In his heart he knew he was responsible for the death of each life that was lost and no one could tell him differently. The information in each folder proved that point abundantly clear and was undeniable. Each of these eight victims would still be alive if they hadn’t fallen in love with him. He put the folder down and poured himself another drink. His thoughts hadn’t changed from the moment he opened his eyes and saw these eight case files sitting in front of him. Who mood wouldn’t darken after holding up each folder as if they were the only things he had left of all eight women, which they were?

     His dark thoughts wavered when he felt two caring arms wrap themselves around his shoulders and disappeared fully when he felt the soft kiss to his cheek that followed. Maybe he was getting use to the snoring, not likely. But, that one small comfort of those arms had him shaking his head in disbelief. Once again the tension within his body started to slowly recede. He leaned back in her arms with his eyes closed and thought back to how this crap had all begun.

VIEW ONE
Mirror Mirror

 

CHAPTER 1
Stud

     His hands wouldn’t stop shaking. This was a clear indication of what had happened the night before. It had begun again and there was nothing he could do about it. He had been to so many doctors who specialized in this sort of thing that he could say there tongue twisting words better than they could. Test after test was performed and very few of them were painless. He didn't have long to wait for the outcome after each examination. In the end he had no other choice, but to believe their final diagnosis. Even an idiot would understand they had no choice when each doctor had given them the same crappy news.

     The episodes would grow in their intensity and someday would lead to the worse of them all. After that, he would never have to worry about it ever happening to him again. It wasn’t as if he was going to die when this final episode occurred, but he might as well with how the ones he previously experienced had wreaked havoc over every square inch of his body and completely scramble his mind. The uncontrollable hand spasms had lessened from the first episode he had experienced, but they still happened. Luckily, if you were a sap and believe in happy endings, none of these events would cause him to have a heart attack or a stroke. Actually, none of that really worried him.

     All he needed was for the big one to happen when he would need his wits about him the most. If that were to occur then… He only hoped the person who got his case was someone he knew or who gave a shit about him. Professional jealousy was still alive and kicking and it was easy to point out those in his department who would just love to knock off number one, (professionally speaking that is). He took a calming breath and looked into the mirror as he tried to remember what had caused this latest episode.

     That was his only concern with these attacks. At least he did have a warning of sorts that one of these episodes was about to begin. He had mere moments before… Hell, sometimes he would simply black out and not remember what he had said or done. But, all wasn’t totally lost. He knew of two causes for the blackouts. Unfortunately, only one of them was preventable.

     The one he could control was actually simple. One of the causes occurred if he had the smallest amount of alcohol of any kind. The one that was totally out of his control occurs whenever he finds himself in an extremely personal stressful situation. You would think his job would have him passing out every few minutes, but he actually enjoyed the stress his career placed on him every day.

     It kept his mind focused on something he could control. That is except for one small problem at his job he absolutely had no control over whatsoever. He would just have to come to terms with that problem sooner or later. Or, as his friend and partner would say; (just get over it). Before he could go over what he was doing the night before which could have been the cause of his blackout, his cell phone rang.

     “Detective Stutter, 733rd Precinct. How may I...”

     “Hey Stud, what’s taking you so long? Got someone up there with you?”

     “Very funny idiot,” he laughed, falsely with a scowl on his face and a twitch of his right eye. He hated being called Stud as a nickname and his partner knew it. “I’m on my way down, and don’t call me Stud!”

     “No need to rush Stud,” he chuckled. “The captain called just to remind you that we have, or should I say, you have a news conference to do at City Hall this morning. I tried to tell her you didn’t forget again and was on your way like a good little boy to tell everyone how wonderful you are. But, I don’t think she bought it. Hell, even I’m still shocked at how you solved that case.”

     Stutter had to admit that he wondered the same thing himself. All the evidence pointed to someone else, except for one small coin in the victim’s pocket. At first anyone would’ve thought it was an ordinary penny, but pennies aren’t that small. It was a German coin called a Pfennig. Of all the people who were linked to the victim, only one person had recently taken a trip overseas. That person was the victim’s wife.

     After taking a closer look at all the evidence that was gathered once again, that single coin made several things fall into place. The man must have learned that his wife wasn’t going on yet another business trip on his corporation’s tab. He was going to confront her about it and one other important matter. Oh, but the woman had not cleaned up her tracks after that visit as well as she had thought.

     The victim’s bank accounts had deductions from one of the most expensive suit shops in New York, none of which would ever fit the skinny pint size fool. There was also a string of one-night hotel deductions that he had not charged. He had a special card for that, and those deductions listed a golf shop the victim privately owned. But, her biggest mistake was using the fireplace to burn the divorce papers he must’ve given her the day of the murder. No one had need of a fire in the middle of the summer. One thing the victim did that almost had his mistress looking to receive a needle and a dirt nap. He had recently placed her in his will.

     She was to receive a nice tidy sum if something were to happen to him before they were married. That and that alone had placed her at the top of the list of suspects. The cause was there, the opportunity was there, but the motive was very shaky. After he read the mistress’ medical report from the jail, the motive instantly became extremely shaky. He wonders himself, what would cause a man to leave his mistress ten million dollars? Then and again, she did look as if she would have little difficulties get that and more from a eunuch. Seeing her as she was without makeup and wearing an orange jumpsuit did very little to change that opinion one bit. Compared to the victim’s wife, who was still a show-stopper, the man was moving into a very good neighborhood. Upgrading was one thing, but she was…

     “Oh, shit,” Stutter choked. “I’m going to be late!”

     He ran from his bathroom, jumped into his clothes, threw a tie around his neck, hopped around on one foot and then the other tying his shoes, nearly fell over a pile of his dirty clothes on the floor, clipped on his shield and made sure the safety on his gun was off before he placed it in his holster.

     He knew one day he was going to shoot himself in the foot, but when you put people away with more money than most small countries, you had to take the bad with the worse. After this last case, the wife’s friend might feel a bit upset for no longer having… Stutter’s cell phone rang again as he was running through his front door.

     When we arrived at city hall, I had only one thought. I should have come up with a better lie to avoid yet another game of reporters’ roulette. There was no way of getting out of it except to eat a bullet and I was starting to get hungry. What made matters worse was my partner and his one bad habit. I knew I was in trouble whenever the man kept his mouth shut. So far, he hadn’t said a word for over twenty minutes, and that by alone meant he wanted something important.

     “Hey Stud. I need you to do something for me?”

     “Why do I get the feeling that your wife may be involved?” I said, sarcastically.

     “Now that would be something. I never had two…”

     “I’m serious!” I snapped, hotly. “You’re going to have to do this one on your own. I’m tired of covering for you.”

     “Now isn’t that a wonderful example of loyalty the way you back up your partner. I’m not as popular as you Stud, so I have to work extra hard for anyone to notice me.”

     (Partner my ass!), I thought. As far as this fool being noticed, his partner and best friend was what all women wanted. He was tall, handsome, muscular, a deep voice, and smooth with the compliments. Unfortunately, he had only one drawback, in my mind at least. The fool would forget he was married whenever some long legs, shaking backside, chest bouncing, or a gorgeous face was anywhere his eyes could see. Now my partner was about to get me involved with yet another… acquaintance. If my friend ever got around to showing me some pointers as he had promised, maybe I would be able to…

     “Fine,” I growled. “But, before you get ahead of yourself, what flavor of the moment got your nose wide open this time?”

     “Hold that thought, Stud,” he said, excitedly. “Here comes the captain.”

     That was all I needed to deal with at that particular moment. If I wasn’t head over heels and nose wide open for the woman, I would’ve told her what she could do with herself when she first arrived at my precinct and started shaking my world… shaking several things up. She was both a sugar rush to the senses and fingernails scraping across a chalkboard all wrapped up in one small package. It wasn’t too hard to put up with her chewing on my backside as long as things kept moving from under her chin and I was able to get a quick glance at what she used as a wonderful chair cushion.

     It also helped that she barely came above my chin and had to look up as I looked… What a view! Only once did she smile at me with those venom spewing lips of hers. As far as those eyes of hers were concerned, I gave up on knowing my own name. Believe it or not, on one occasion she had actually sat in my lap.

     It was the Precinct’s Christmas Party. I was in her office behind her desk, sitting in her chair with my lap full, facing away from the door so no one could see us, and she had one too many. What better scene could you ever imagine for something amazing to happen and the mistletoe she had placed over her right ear when she had entered the room and had cut off her office light kind of remove the smallest shred of doubt? Even a fool would’ve done some serious tongue wrestling with her right then and there as she slowly moved her lips closer for a serious wet one.

     Why I stopped her from… I still counted that as the single biggest blunder in my entire life. From that moment on, my ass had become her personal chew toy she gnawed on daily. It was highly possible the reason for her extended anger was due to the fact that somehow the word had gotten out and everyone down at the 733rd believed the two of us were keeping our relationship very quiet. Married couples who have been battling for years were quieter then how she would…

     By the way my captain was walking over to the car like an unforgiving natural disaster on those fast little shapely legs of hers, she was either going to shoot me in the head (as she had always promised) or take what I had denied her. She took almost sadistic pleasure exacting her retribution for the Christmas present I gave back to her unopened and untouched that it would always haunt me. And now, she only waited for the perfect moment she could gain back her respect as a woman (which she made sure no one ever heard her say to me the day after the infamous Christmas party). Now that was a thought that I wouldn’t mind hearing her say again and would even…

     “The reporters are getting restless!” her voice snapped. And, the chalkboard was getting one hell of a workout. “You best hurry up and get this thing started before the commissioner tries to hit on me again.”

     “Hey Captain,” my partner called, mischievously with his usual stupid grin he always had on that guilty face of his. “I have an idea.”

     “I have heard enough ideas from you to last a lifetime, Detective. I’m lucky I had stopped your so call last idea in time before things had gotten worse. This is Stutter’s show so let him think of how he can make me look good.”

     “It was only a thought to get the big boss's attention going in another direction, Captain.”

     “At this point, I’ll do almost anything for that to happen, and that includes having the fool think that I’m sleeping with Stutter.”

     “Well, now that you mention it,” my partner chuckled, suspiciously as he nodded his head in my direction.

     “I would feed him a bullet first and then do worse. He may be the only officer on the force to ever wear the badge that fraternization charges wouldn’t apply because of his celebrity, but… Never mind that!” she snarled, hotly and turned her full attention back to me. “Move Detective," she snarled. "Or, would you like me to use a nice little bullet with your name on it?”

     I should’ve known that this day was going to be my worst nightmare with my eyes wide open, but even she would never… She actually pulled out a bullet from her purse and showed it to me with a cold smile. As she had said, my name was engraved on the side of the brass casing. Well, at the least I finally knew she wasn’t interested and would never be, but damn!

     By the look she now wore on her face, she was about to send me to the morgue in a body bag. It would not surprise me if she had special ordered one with my name on it as if it was part of a Stutter Dirt Nap gift set. If I had any luck at all, her look only meant she was going to drag me back to the precinct to clean more toilets. After she put the bullet away, her eyes seemed to brighten. I had never seen that look before, and that alone had me checking to see if I’d worn my vest. When I looked away, she giggled (yes actually giggled). I checked for my vest again.

     “Now that I think about it,” she said, brightly. “I could live with the idea of people talking about you and me Detective. Who knows, this might stop the rumors about Ms. Greenleaf wanting to get into your pants. She’s already talked to the Mayor and several members of the City Council about having you attend some big charity art show she is having soon.”

     “What!” I choked.

     “You didn’t know?” his captain asked, suspiciously.

     “I’ve never met the woman. All I know about her is what’s written in the paper or shown on the news.”

     “Well, she gave the impression that the two of you were old friends. You may wish to watch what you say around her. She had the mayor so shook-up, he might give up his job to go hide in another country. I do not know if word about her is true, but I haven’t heard of one person who didn’t lose everything they had who pissed her off.”

     “I’ve heard the same thing,” I growled. “And, would you believe, I’ve been to the scene of several suicides of those who might have done just that. Thank you so very much.”

     “Don’t piss me off Detective. Remember, I was the one who had assigned those suicides to you. Change of subject. So, super Detective Stutter, how would you like to show up to that high class art show with me on your arm in a hot little low cut black dress,” she said, playfully looking up at me with her large brown hypnotic eyes stopping my breathing… again.

     If my face could get any redder, something was going to catch fire. But, all in all, my day had just taken a turn for the better.

     “Now, if I could get out of doing this…” I said, tentatively.

     “Let’s go Detective,” she said, sternly as she pointed towards the front door.

     As soon as we walked into the conference room, flashes erupted and TV cameras’ flood lights nearly blinded me and the calling of my name had begun. It was always the initial onslaught that started these things off on the wrong foot. It wasn’t as if I was going to say anything until I stood behind the podium or give them something one could report quicker than their competitors. What I hated most of all was the spots I would have to deal with for the next half hour or so.

     I turned sideways and was now looking forward to my Captain brushing by me as she took the lead up to a microphone covered podium. That was before I noticed my partner’s hand was on her… And, her hand was on his… That could only mean… She was the person my partner… And, after she had just said about the two of… I turned back to the reporters with a sign on my forehead that said SUCKER!

     “Detective Stutter!" an excited reporter called, excitedly as he jumped to his feet. "Was there a reason why she killed her husband?”

     “I would say for the money. However, in actuality it was the embarrassment socially she couldn’t deal with. In her mind it was equivalent to social suicide. The victim was planning to ask for a divorce and his current wife truly didn’t care for the idea.”

     “Is it true that the victim left a large sum of money to his mistress?” another reporter asked.

     “I wouldn’t call her his mistress. It would seem that the current wife had all, but spoken her approval of his extra marital… friendship. They had lived totally separate lives in every way for several years, and had only recently reconciled, so the current wife wanted everyone to believe. It would seem that her wish for reconciliation of their marriage came a little too late. It would also seem she had tried very hard to hide the fact that the victim had already set wedding plans in motion, and was to be married once the divorce was finalized shortly after the required thirty days to insure it was all legal.”

     “Detective Stutter,” another reporter called out. “So, who gets the money?”

     “I would say the victim’s only child and its mother. His fiancée was pregnant and this was the reason why the victim was pushing hard for a quick divorce. This is yet another reason I would prefer you do not use the word mistress. When the child gets older, he or she may want to learn all they could about their father. Not only was a man’s life lost, but also a future husband, and a father who will never see their child. I have no control over what you report, but for those who are looking to gain headlines over a child’s feelings, I wish you well. Just don’t think that if something were to happen to you that I would think to take your case or answer another question from you ever again.”

     “Detective Stutter,” the same reporter called, visibly startled. “That sounds to me as if you are…?”

     “Say what you want!” I yelled. “Are there any more questions? No. Good morning.”

     I knew I shouldn’t have let my anger get the best of me, but the reporter who always tried to start trouble at my news conferences was sitting in the front roll with an oily smirk on his face. This winy slimy sniveling bastard was sure to find himself beaten bloody in some dark alleyway one day very soon looking for his lost shoe and picking up his teeth. How the rag he wrote for remained in existence with the amount of lawsuits it receives by the hour because of this one reporter was a mystery even I could not solve. When he raised his hand, I stepped away from the podium and looked to leave.

     “Detective Stutter,” the irritating troll of a reporter called out, rudely with an oily snicker.

     After what I had just gone through with my captain and partner, you would think I would be due for a break. I should have known the fool remaining quiet throughout the entire news conference only meant he was going to the front page of every national news outlet on the planet. As soon as I heard his squeak hole snicker, he was shooting for a those magical words every reporter want’s tied to their name; Breaking News!

     “Is it true that you are now seeing to the comfort of the victim’s home wrecking whore? The man did have a fortune and you did work hard to clear her of all charges. Any woman who can’t even spell their own name would feel grateful and would be more than happy to show you their…”

     I ignored the fool and walked away, but was stopped when I felt a hand grab my arm harshly.

     When we returned to the precinct, it seemed as if everyone’s shield had a black band. All talk was hushed, people moved out of our way, including the criminals, and no one dare look in our direction.

     “Did we lose someone?” the Captain screeched.

     “We all saw the broadcast of the news conference, Captain. Mind you, we don’t believe what that asshole said, but what will people think? Stutter did give a perfect example of a beat down.”

     “Who gives a rat’s…?” she snarled.

     An officer ran into the room in a panic.

     “Captain!" he called, excitedly and clearly out of breath. "The Commissioner has just arrived and he doesn’t look happy.”

     “That’s all we need!” she spat, angrily.

     “You mean, that’s all I need,” I chuckled, loudly and actually relaxed. “Well, if he’s coming for my badge, he can have it. That fool had it coming.”

     “You could’ve waited until they turned off the cameras,” my partner snickered, tightly under his breath. “At lease, it would’ve been…”

     “Detective Stutter!” a very repulsive sounding voice called out.

     “I’m over here Commissioner,” I answered, strongly and waved so he knew where I was standing.

     The man was vertically challenged and it took him a moment to look around all the officers that somehow blocked his view. Once he spotted me, he rushed forward with his hand extended and a bright smile on his face. This was a first. Whenever the man visited the 733rd, it was always to cause trouble, or hit on his captain.

     “Let me be the first to congratulate you on how you handled that reporter,” he chuckled. “But, unfortunately, I have to suspend you for two weeks. And, the first person who blabs that he is still receiving a check will find themselves with the worst assignment I can find. Detective, there will be an inquiry at City Hall this afternoon where you will receive your official suspension from the Mayor. After that, there will be a small gathering in your honor. Oh, here is a DVD of you knocking that brainless wonder cold.

     I never thought the newsrooms around here would make a copy for your enjoyment and not put it in heavy rotation. Well, I got to be going. Everyone is gathering in the mayor’s office for a catered lunch to watch your… discussion with that reporter and hear a blow by blow commentary from the mayor himself. Captain,” the commissioner called out, slyly as he gave her an inappropriate oily smile. “I’ll be happy to give you a ride to the…”

     “No need, Commissioner,” she said, quickly as she moved swiftly up next to me and wrapped herself around my arm as if it was a pole she was about to use for a dance. “We were planning on going out on the town to celebrate this evening anyway. I hope you’ll understand.”

     “I would hate to have the City Council think that they should file fraternization charges against the two of you.”

     It was his fat little smirk on his fat little face that made him want to beat his fat little butt, but only one thing was stopping me. The dimness was growing around my eyes as soon as my captain had… She was holding me tightly and rubbing up against him with her… Stroking the back side of my hand and looking up at him with those… I had to calm myself down quickly or I would have another… episode. Part of me wanted to see if I could get the Commissioner’s fat ass out of the nearest window and the other part of me wanted to see what was on the DVD. I remembered none of what had happened.

.

CHAPTER 2
My House My Rules

     The grand hall was scrubbed from corner to corner by hand. Each chandelier was lowered with great care for a thorough cleaning. All windows were verified streak and dust free by no less than three people and all wearing white gloves. This meticulous preparation wasn’t necessary before they began bringing in the many crates, pedestals, and easels, but was adamantly demanded. The placements of hooks on the walls were so precise that many were afraid to breathe as each measurement was taken and each nail was struck. Once the enormous room was confirmed as perfectly prepared, it was time for the next and most crucial step to begin.

     Some of the items that were going on display had to be removed from its protected covers and crates with the utmost care and others by professionals hired from the city’s museum. As with the majority of the items that were going on display, they should themselves be in a museum or behind protective glass with an armed guard standing before them. Unfortunately, most of those who were to attend wouldn’t know what they were looking at, but that didn’t matter.

     The person responsible for these treasures seeing the light of day had caused the owner to do whatever it took to show how flattered she was to have him attend. Even a very recluse and world-renowned art dealer was called in so there would be no mistake in each item's presentation. Oh, but if that wasn’t enough to impress this special invitee, the art dealer was asked to bring with them some of the rarest pieces of art known on the planet.

     The person who task was to see to the wants of the person who was putting on the art show stood to the side as the workers made subtle changes according to the owner’s whim or the art dealer’s keen eye. When the hand waved him over, he did his best to school his expression so it wouldn’t show any emotion. Of course that was until she spoke and then things went downhill fast.

     “I want everything perfect for the detective. He is our honored guest and I wish him to feel at ease. It has been over a week now and I do not feel we have all in order.”

     The Chief Butler quickly looked over his checklist for the event. He mainly did this to avoid giving her an excuse to ask him if the other arrangements were prepared for the sixth time in the past few minutes. It was true that it has been over a week, but everything was ready several hours after she decided to do something so she would have an excuse to meet the man. Something like this had only occurred twice before and both instances were quite memorable.

     Unfortunately, both men ended up receiving her anger for what had happened after she realized her expectations were far greater than the reality each had displayed once they had opened their mouths. He was about to think of something to excuse himself from her presence when one of the servants rushed up to him and whispered excitedly in his ear. Luckily it was good news for once and he finally felt relieved. A sacrificial idiot had arrived just in time.

     “Madam, you have a guest.”

     “Who would dare disturb me when I have a very important man to attend to?” she asked, intensely and the temperature within the large ballroom lowered.

     “It is the owner of that newspaper you acquired this morning. He urgently wishes to have a word with you.”

     “Ah,” she cackled. “Let the fool in so he can beg. I wish to show the detective that he has my full support.”

     The butler turned around quickly to hide his sour expression. She wanted to give him her support, but actually it was her single desire to serve him his breakfast in the morning. He knew also that this one would be around as long as the other two. For some reason he could never remember their names. It seemed that she had tried to give her… full support once a month, but only fully twice and on each of those occasions it only lasted for one night and then she would behaved the following day as if nothing had occurred. Many hoped that each possible overnight stay would have them experience a welcome change in her attitude the next day, but that had never happened.

     Everyone in the household, especially him, wished she would finally run into a man she either had not forced to sleep with her or destroyed totally after the rejection. Who was he fooling? He had a better chance having Santa Clause bring him a Choo-Choo Train than the woman meeting her match. He had seen this Detective Stutter on TV during news conferences or as a spokesperson for his department, read about his exploits in the newspapers and magazines, and took great care reading the reports on him from the head of security.

     Without a shadow of doubt, the man was sure to turn the woman down before she could think to point him to her bedroom’s doors. As with the others, he too would soon have his last day as employed or employable shortly thereafter as did they. He had barely nodded his head to have one of the maids open the door when the person on the other side rushed in.

     “Miss Greenleaf,” the former owner of that newspaper called out, fearfully. “I have done what you wish. He will never get another job with any news organization again for the rest of his life.”

     “Are you sure about that, or are you trying to save yourself for allowing such a man to marry your daughter?”

     “Miss Greenleaf, I assure you he…”

     “If I were you, I would speak to your daughter before the end of this day and convince her to divorce such a man immediately or things might get… undesirable for your whole family. We are of course talking about all your other relations as well. And, trust me when I say that it matters little what city, state or country they are hiding under some rock, they will not escape my… attention.

     I now own the mortgages on all of your families’ homes and businesses. I know of which colleges those young ones in your family attend or plan to and the jobs they hold or hope to gain. Let me not also forget to mention that I especially know of the people whom company each fellowship with socially. Who, I might as well add, those who are not married to them, but to other men and women. Now, listen closely or I shall see how your wife feels about this latest secretary who was most willing to remain employed.

     Is she not the third executive assistant you have hired this month?” she asked, slowly as one of her eyebrows raised. “I have the utmost confidence once my attorneys are involved that the extraordinarily diminutive amount of money you paid for the others not to file harassment charges on you will no longer hold sway. My people have a way of helping people see the error of their ways and testify as I see fit. If I were you, I would do my utmost to show atonement for this grievous error. Once your daughter is rid of this man you allowed her to marry, I shall take it as a sign you wish my forgiveness. In return, your daughter will be rewarded of course.

     I would say that after her return from one of the fat farms I own, receiving instruction on proper behavior, and seeing my plastic surgeons, her finding someone suitable will no longer be a problem. After you have foolishly allowed that reporter to marry into your family, I shall see to that small task as well. I shall give you this one opportunity to redeem yourself and save your family. I will have someone send over instructions for a few of your more salvageable family members to perform tasks I demand accomplished without question or comment.

     Some of these tasks they shall do for the rest of their miserable lives or wish they had with the life that they would be rewarded for not accepting my kindness. From this day forward, you shall report the news as I see fit through my people. Now, if you would excuse me, I have someone who has my full attention soon to call. It would be best if you run along and follow my instructions or someone else will follow my instructions to remove this seldom given opportunity.”

     All the Chief Butler could do was nod his head for security to drag the hysterical man away. It wasn’t as if he would try to harm Miss Greenleaf, but groveling in thanks bubbling like a nose running fool is so unbecoming. The man was a fool, had the taste of an idiot, and the sight of a blind man. It was either that or he had the cunning of a jackal and the awareness of the supernatural.

     He had seen the pictures of his secretaries before the Madame asked for them and wondered why any man would wish to have that lot of mutts in or out of their bed. If the man had some courage, he would have known no one would believe any or all three of them would cause a man to force himself on them unless he was related to a rock, an especially visionless rock at that. He had more important things to do than laugh at the fool.

     It actually wasn’t important, but it did seem strange until he received the report from the head of security. Once his finding was confirmed he had to make sure the detective’s favorite beer was properly chilled. To his surprise, the beer was non-alcoholic.

     There was an art form to something as self-indulgent as a beer. If it was too cold, you were sucking a frothy icicle. And, if it was too warm, then you were chewing a foam cotton ball. Oh, but when it was perfect, it was perfect from the moment it touched your lips until you taste it the second time around with the refreshing burp that followed. At the moment, the sound of the bottle’s top being popped and the wonderful soft hiss that followed wasn’t appreciated by a set of large hypnotic heated eyes peering down at me. Oh, hell no! I ignored the obvious threat and took a healthy swig and enjoyed every moment of the experience.

     “So what if I want to have a beer?” I responded, fiercely to the unasked question. “I doubt that crowd would know what it was or what you do with it, so say what you want. I’m taking it with me. Besides, its non-alcoholic.”

     I couldn’t believe I was actually defending myself in my own house for what I liked. This was madness and I knew it was only the tip of the iceberg. When my uninvited guest arrived, I was stupid enough to not only answer them after looking through the peephole, but to actually open the door and let them in as well. Now I felt as if I was under inspection, which I now knew I was.

     If it wasn’t for what my eyes saw from head to toe, with her long coat that only hid so much, and those damn devastating bedroom eyes of hers, I would ask her to get the hell out. Oh, but what I could see of the black dress she had mentioned only once was, now permanently fried to the back of my skull, had nailed my tongue to the roof of my dry mouth, and now smacked me around all so nice that I was ready to ask for more!

     She must have noticed my redden face, as if you could hide the glare from a noon sun two feet in front of you, and thought I was about to lose my temper. She quickly reminded me that the limo was to pick the two of us up at my place and that was the only reason for her being there. As with most conversations between the two of us, she flipped the switch of her emotions quicker than a flicker of one of her long eyelashes.

     Without warning or reason, she was once again giving that chalk board a workout like never before and threw in a few healthy bites of my butt for good measure as well. After I felt the blood dripping from my ears, I was on the verge to throw up the white flag in defeat until I remembered the person she truly wanted to spend the evening with wasn’t me.

     It was the memory of my partner and the captain looking at each other like the two of them were made out of candy, and you couldn’t tell who had the biggest sweet tooth. That and that alone had relit a fire and it showed clearly in my eyes by how she now looked at me. All that was needed at that particular moment was the tiniest of sparks for people from miles around to see all the pretty colors in the sky and the mushroom cloud that was soon to follow.

     “Have you also forgotten who you are addressing, Detective?” she snarled, angrily with her eyes on fire.

     “What’s your point, Captain?” I snapped back, coldly.

     “I’m sure you do have some manners.”

     “If you haven’t noticed, this is my house! And, would you also believe,” I said, sarcastically as hell. “I’m off duty. I know this might be something obvious, but the door you walked in is right behind you. If you give me a moment, I can open it for you so you can walk back through. How’s that for manners, Captain?”

     “It is obvious something has upset you. Ok, let me hear it?”

     “You may want my badge, and you are more than welcome to have it right now, but I am tired of being jerked around like a chew toy.”

     “Is this about everyone thinking we are a couple? It has only been a few days. Talk will die down and soon no one will think anything of it.”

     “That is some of it. Now, I have to dress up in this monkey suit and sip tea with my pinkie sticking up in the air. I’d like to lift the finger of my choice, but the mayor and most of the City Council are not taking any chances that I might piss off this Greenleaf woman. I can’t begin to tell you how many e-mails and phone calls I’ve receive several times a day. I can barely get anything done from the moment I sit at my laptop. Did these people forget I’m suspended? If that isn’t bad enough, now they’re sending a limo to pick me up. What in the hell do they think, I’m going to miss this wonderful butt kissing jamboree? And, will you look at this thing they got me in.”

     “You said that twice, Detective. I think you look good in a tuxedo. Who knows, maybe this Greenleaf woman would…”

     “So when were you going to tell me that I am nothing, but a decoy for you and my partner,” I said, abruptly cut her off.

     “I don’t know what you are talking about,” she said, hastily in a rush of words as she walked passed me, snatching my beer out of my hand, and pouring the rest of it down the kitchen’s drain. “And, if I were having a moment or two with your partner, it is none of your…”

     That was the last straw! Did she forget she was in my house, and was doing as she pleased as if she made the rules here as she does it the precinct? She had taken my beer as if she had the right to pour it out. And, to top that, she brushed up against him seductively and was swaying her hips in the way that always slaps me around to grab my full attention. Oh, the match was struck, the fuse was lit, and the explosion was imminent!

     “If it’s none of my business, then you can take my shield and shove it up your…”

     “Sounds to me as if you are jealous,” she said, coldly with a small grin she made sure he couldn’t see. “It’s time to go Detective. The limousine is here.”

     “I didn’t hear the driver blow the horn.”

     “Oh, I didn’t tell you,” she now spoke, calmly. “It arrived when I did and I told him not to bother beeping. Now that you brought up the subject Detective, it might not have been a bad idea to bring your partner along… as a spare.”

     For the most part, the ride was quiet. After my little blow up at my apartment, you would think the woman had ice in her veins. She said not a word about what I had yelled in her face and sat quietly looking out the window of the limo as if nothing had happened at all. All I could do was either look at her until I passed out from the excitement of having her all alone once again or follow her example and look out the window as if I was the only person riding in the back of this boat. When we arrived at a very large and imposing gate, the chauffeur stopped the limo to say a few words to a person at the gate holding a clipboard, and before I could ask what was going on, things started moving around the limo quickly.

     Several cars moved in front of our limo and a few moved into position behind us. Before either one of us could ask, the chauffeur said it was no more than a security escort. For a moment, I actually felt important as if I was a high ranking public official or some owner of several highly ranked global corporations. The entire scene was laughable. Why would two police officers have need of a security escort? This wasn’t the only thing that validated my thoughts that I was being setup. When we arrived at the entrance to an enormous building, there were people lined up on both sides of the walkway.

     After one quick look at what they wore, I breathed a sigh of relief. They were all women in maids’ outfits. When a few of them smiled, and some more openly excited than others, I felt a tight constriction around my arm without the pressure in my chest. Why the woman felt she had to act as if we were an actual couple at that very moment, I would understand as soon as I knew the answer to the meaning of life. It was only when we began our walk towards the building’s doors and the servants started to trail behind us that my concern heightened once again.

     Were they to follow me like a second skin all evening? Would this Greenleaf person insure each of my final breaths I was allowed to take is counted? Would she now be notified when her prey was in the perfect location of her choosing to spring her trap at the snap of her finger? I shook those thoughts off and believed I was just the last to arrive.

     There was no longer a need to have a welcoming group waiting to greet the guest invited to this nosebleed party. It wasn’t until I noticed in the corner of my eye that other limos were still arriving behind us that I wished I had worn my bulletproof vest, and had my backup weapon with me. I was wrong once again, and hopefully not dead wrong. Seeing this wasn’t the only thing that gave reason for my new fears.

     They had a security checkpoint setup once you walked into the front double doors. The line was long and I could see that they insured nothing got through. When the servants surrounded the two of us and moved around the screening checkpoint without stopping, I could now hear the final strike that nailed the coffin shut. It was obvious that I was now in some serious trouble.

     After our coats were taken, we were escorted in another direction than the others who were there to attend the charity art show. Before I could open my mouth to say something stupid, I was given a beer to relax before I was to make my grand entrance. I was about to give it back until I saw the bottle it was poured from. This added to the long list of things to remember. However, this one was undeniably welcomed. When I heard a little growl coming from my left, I drank deeply, and handed the emptied glass back to the servant before I moved toward, what I hoped, was the door into the main room. We had taken only a few steps inside when I felt the Captain jerk me backwards harshly.

     “That’s her standing over there to the left. She’s the woman in the insanely expensive blue dress with the crowd trying desperately to find an opening to kiss her ass. As you can see, Detective,” she snickered, openly with a false grin. “The mayor, commissioner, most of the city council, and several very wealthy people are all wishing to remain on her good side. You might want to do the same.”

     That was one thought for which I didn’t need to be pointed out or given a reminder. So this was the woman who had the entire world cringing when angered. She didn’t look as if she was menacing enough to frighten a toddler, but I had never been good at reading women. Take my captain as a clear example of that fact. I had to admit Miss Greenleaf wasn’t hard to look at. Hell, I could lose several hours admiring her face alone. As far as the rest of her was concerned, wow! She definitely wasn’t hard to look at.

     “So what can you tell me about our host, Captain?” I asked, seriously with my full attention fixed directly on Ms. Greenleaf.

     “I see you are interested,” she laughed, falsely and then looked to hit me over my head with the first thing she could lay her hands on when she saw my grin blossom brightly on my face.

     “Maybe. She isn’t hard on the eyes,” I chuckled, deeply.

     “This isn’t a game detective,” she hissed, coldly.

     “Who said I was playing. Oh, by the way, that is a nice dress you aren’t wearing. And, to take a play from your book you were so nice to say before we left my apartment, it’s none of your business.”

     “I said it was none of your business, but that didn’t mean this isn’t my business. You better…” she snarled, tightly under her breath.

     “Not the right words to say, Captain,” I said, evenly as I cut her off from continuing.

     The argument was short and surprisingly quiet for once. Unfortunately, as soon as all the fight was out of me, I finally took a good look at all of her and wished I had not. Flowing long black evening dress, low cut in the front and cut low enough in the back to just stop at the crack of her… But, it was her eyes that confused me most. The way she looked up at me at that moment, would lead any man to think she…

     I knew I should have stopped playing the moment I noticed everyone was paying close attention to him. I had my suspicions about what was told to me. Was Ms. Greenleaf actually interested in Stutter? Well, I didn’t have long to wait for that answer as soon as we were given a security escort, bypassed a security checkpoint, and he was given the only kind of beer he drinks. I had hoped that this, nearly naked, dress would grab his attention long enough for me to tell him how I truly…

     “I shall fire my staff at once,” a breathless voice announced, warmly as the person moving up to us. “I did not know you had finally arrived Chief Detective Jonathan Stutter or I would have greeted you at the door personally. I am honored that you could make it to my fundraiser. Oh, where are my manners? I am Janie Greenleaf.”

     I grinned inwardly. The woman’s first impression was about to be her last. Other than hating to be called Stud, Stutter’s feeling about being called John was a sight only safe to be seen behind a protective barrier, and the use of his actual first name was an explosion that was legendary down at the precinct. I knew something was terribly wrong when nothing happened. Before I had a chance to step in-between Stutter and Ms. Greenleaf, he moved forward with his hand extended and was actually smiling.

     “It’s nice to meet you as well Ms. Greenleaf. Let me introduce you to my…”

     “I am sure she can find her way around on her own. Excuse us sweetie.”

     With that said and only that, Stutter was dragged away and I had a great urge to pull my small caliber gun I had strapped to my…

     “Captain,” an oily voice called out, absolutely bubbling overjoyed as he slowly stroked a finger down my exposed arm.

     “Commissioner,” I said, formally as I moved my hand near the mid-thigh slit in my dress. “What can you tell me about our host before you draw back a nub?”.

CHAPTER 3
The Old Ball And Gold Chain

     The woman was quick thinking, unbelievably aggressive, had more hands hidden some place my eyes couldn’t see, and was constantly insisting I call her by her first name. If her butler didn’t look as if he would take a compliment the wrong way, I would’ve thanked him for having something important to shift Greenleaf’s attention away from me as if I was the last martini in the shaker.

     The woman had my paranoia at such a high state of worry that I almost believed that the butler was trying to hit on me as well. Now wouldn’t that round this nightmare off nicely? The only drawback was I never had a chance to ask her why she had insisted the mayor insure I came to her little plastic peoples' party. One thing for sure, I didn’t know what game the woman had in mind for me, but I wasn’t going to follow the rules. From the moment she walked away, I felt I was now on display.

     Whenever my gaze would pass by a person who worked for her, they thought I wanted to speak with them and came running. I would be the last person to ever say that they didn’t enjoy being right, but at this moment, in this place, and surrounded by these people, being wrong was would be a good thing. The servants that met me the moment I stepped out of the limo were actually following me. This sorrowful revelation only made me look for any place I could be left alone or the nearest exit that wasn’t covered by her people to block my escape. 

     From where I stood, she had me boxed in and good. There had to be somewhere I could maneuver for a quiet moment to think this situation through. One misplaced word or action and I would have the mayor crying on my shoulder. Unfortunately, every corner of the room was occupied in groups large and small, except for one small spot.

     Standing all by themselves looking at a painting, stood my salvation as if they were the only person on a small deserted island. She looked harmless, but in a crowd like this, she might cause more harm than Greenleaf. Now that I got a better look at the woman, she wasn’t just harmless, she was that adorable little deer in the petting zoo that everyone wanted to touch, but no one wanted to frighten them in any way.

     She wasn’t entirely small for a woman, but her thin frame made it look so. The black evening dress she wore looked as if she was trying to hide that she had a womanly shape at all. With strands of her hair not cooperating and the horn rimmed glasses she was wearing, a library or some prissy private school somewhere was looking for her. She was so unassuming that it wouldn’t be hard to walk past her and be startled that she was standing right before you. She was perfect! 

     No one would dare assume I was trying to pick her up or try to interrupt a quiet conversation between the two of us and cause a scene. I walked slowly up to where she stood as she looked at the painting before her intensely with only one thing in mind. Do not frighten her away. I decided to say something to break the ice and hope she wouldn’t run away from me as if I was some pervert trying to make a pass at her. Now that I was closer to her, she wasn’t hard to admire intensely herself as she was to the painting in front of her.

     “I will admit I don’t know much about art, but that has got to be the ugliest thing I have ever seen in my entire life.”

     For the next twenty minutes I got the crap beat out of me (verbally of course). She made it perfectly clear what she thought of my barbaric and utterly tasteless words. How was I to know she was the person who put this gala together and was making enough money for her precious time as an art expert that would make even the likes of me attractive? I doubt there was enough money in the world to do that, but she had made her point quite clear.

     I could have sworn she had made her thoughts known in several different languages. It was all in English, but I would need several months to decipher most of her words and even longer to put the entire sentence together that it would make sense to me. When she looked to take a breath and continue explaining how less intelligent I was compared to a newly made brick, I jumped in with a little anger of my own.

     “Now that you have… explained to me why I am, I think the word you were searching for is, an asshole, I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening. But, if I ever wish to have someone stick both their feet up my butt and take a long, leisurely sunset walk on a beach with a bottle of champagne in hand and a basket overflowing with chocolate covered strawberries, I’ll give you a call.”

     The mouse that turned into a lioness had just as quickly turned back into a frightened childlike person, with tears in her eyes no less.

     “I’m sorry. Sometimes I… please excuse me.”

     Why I blocked her escape, I didn’t know. But, one thing for sure, there was something about this small, shy woman that had my curiosity working overtime. I looked down at her and handed over my handkerchief.

     “I guess we both got off on the wrong foot. Let me introduce myself. I am…”

     “How can you do that? This whole evening was put together just for you. I guess when you said something about what I had picked out especially for this event, I felt like I had…”

     I knew it was a trap and now had confirmation. The charity art gala was a front, but whatever Greenleaf wanted had to wait for me to think about later. Because of this little mouse that roared, I was actually starting to have fun.

     “You could have picked something from out of my closet and I would still put my foot in my mouth. I think it is just a gift Miss…” I looked to her to finish.

     “Oh! I’m Sienna Freestone.”

     “Well, Ms. Freestone,” I said, comically with a winning smile and a polite bow. All that was missing was the long feathered, wide brim hat to flair foolishly, a tunic with a coat of arms on the front and back, boots that came up above my knees, and sword at my side. “Is there any way I can make my poor choice of words up to you?”

     In a few months, I now had to escort her to the next event in a tuxedo, with flowers, some candy, and have a well-rehearsed compliment for what she was to wear. I knew I was in trouble when she looked to tear up again as I was about to say, not no, but hell no! When I surrendered and nodded my head yes, she practically fell over in shock. Well, what was a couple of hours looking like a fool? The way things were going for me so far, I would be an expert just in time for her next art show. Then and again, it wouldn’t be too bad spending a few hours with the mouse.

     She did have a nice smile and a very pleasant voice. Before I could learn more about Sienna, I felt an unwelcome tap on my arm. With my luck of late, it probably was my captain wanting me to tell the limo driver to drop her off where she would normally meet up with my partner at some out of the way hotel. When I turned around, I should have known it could be worse. Not by much, but not something I would wish on anyone.

     “I should not have been surprised that the great Detective Jonathan Stutter would find the only person here of note. Miss Freestone, would you mind if I steal this handsome man from you? I feel I have not been a gracious host and showed him around my home.”

     (This was her… home!) The little pea between my ears screamed out and recoiled in horror (Hell, I had seen smaller castles on the Discovery Channel.) Ms. Greenleaf and I had taken no more than a few steps away when she stumbled into me and my arm hit…

     “Do not worry about the vase, it is insured. Besides, Miss Freestone didn’t pick that one out for this showing and I never truly liked the thing. I can use the three million for something much nicer.”

     The thought of me breaking a three million dollar vase had my heart thumping wildly and my head… The sharp, crystal like glaze started to form around my vision and…”

     “How dare you be so familiar,” a man’s voice called out, angrily in an almost high pitched squeal. “I will show you your place!”

     I didn’t know what had scared me most. The knock at the door, the white canopy bed, the large cavernous size highly ornate room the bed was in, or the person readjusting herself as she wrapped her arms and legs tightly around me. All these had me scared spit-less and more so when I realized we were both without one single solitary stitch of clothing on the two of us. Unlike when I had beat the crap out of the reporter several days before, I hope there wasn’t a DVD on what had happened when I had an episode this time.

     The second knock seemed urgent. When I heard the voice, I wanted to scream like a preteen girl who just received a kiss to her cheek from her teen idol after getting his autograph on some part of her body. I took a deep breath and spoke softly. At the least, I hoped my voice sounded soft and not desperate.

     “I think someone wish…” my voice cracked horribly.

     “This is my home, dear, and no one wishes matters, except yours of course. It is only my butler wanting to know what you would like for your morning meal and this evening if I can talk you into another overnight visit. I do not want you to have the wrong idea my dear sweet Stutter; you can come to my home whenever you wish. You made it perfectly clear about marriage before we had retired, and I will not force you no matter how much I now wish it. You my dear sweet man have made me a loose woman,” she giggled, softly. “And, I do mean for only you of course.”

     “Ah, I think you should find out what your butler wants.” However, I thought to myself, (And, I should find out what I did to end up here).

     “Come,” she called, strongly to the door.

     “I hate to interrupt your rest Master Stutter, but you have an important call. I had patched it through to the phone on your side of the bed.”

     (Master Stutter!) My brain shuttered a few times before it collapse in on itself. (What the hell did I do and why is the man acting as if I was…) I reached for the phone in hopes to hide my traumatized expression.

     “Hello.”

     “You could’ve let me know you were… enjoying Greenleaf’s company,” she said, heatedly with venom dripping from each word. “At least I could have made my escape without anyone the wiser. And, don’t you ever abandon me when the Commissioner is looking in my direction. If it weren’t for that puffed up penguin of a butler that work for that woman, he would have cornered me. And, just because she had a limo and a nice bottle of champagne for my ride home waiting for me inside, doesn’t mean that you aren’t in trouble. We will speak about this when you get in.”

     “And, what about my suspension, Captain?”

     “I forgot about that. Just give me a call when you get home. I have a few things I wish for you to look into. It would seem you have started, but not in the way I think you should’ve.”

     “What are you…?”

     “Your little friend Greenleaf might be using her influence to control the City Council on several construction and service contracts. She might even be involved in several issues of illegal hiring and firing in both the public and private sectors. I know she has the Mayor eating out of her hands and the Commissioner frighten enough to leave me alone for more than a moment. It is clearly obvious that she has some type of influence on them and many more.”

     “I should be…”

     “Not now,” she giggled, playfully as I could clearly hear my partner’s voice in the background. “Did you say something Detective?”

     “Yes. I think you should ask my partner to do this for you. I’m on vacation!” he yelled, hotly and slammed the phone’s receiver down.

     “Well,” Greenleaf giggled, playfully as she moved closer to him. “Where would you like to go on your vacation? I can have my plane ready to take us to one of my other homes. I have a wonderful island near the Bahamas or we can go to my castle in Ireland. Oh, I know,” she giggled. “I have a lovely ranch in Colorado and I haven’t been out to visit in years. Do you like to go horseback riding?”

     “I have never been on a horse in my life.”

     “Then it is settled, Colorado it is. We can go to the airport after we have our morning meal.”

     “I will see to this at once madam,” the butler said, quickly and spoke to a maid next to him who left the room swinging her hips wildly and giggling.

     The smile on the butler’s face had the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end. The man actually knew how to smile. It was an extremely small smile. Actually, a microscope might have to be used to find it, but I wasn’t that shaken up that I had imagined it. I had to stop this, but how? Knowing this woman, she would have me bound, gagged, wrapped in a bright bow personally by the mayor and commissioner, and thrown in the trunk of her limo all the way to the airport. I had a thought, it was weak, but it was the first and only thing I could think of at that very moment.

     “You might have heard that I am involved with my…”

     “Then she should have put up a better fight. This may sound hurtful, but it would seem that our fat little Police Commissioner had her attention more than you. I think the woman is mad, but her loss is my…” she stopped, suddenly remembered they weren’t alone and blushed deeply. “My most handsome gentleman friend. If you would Sean, tell all we shall leave as soon as…”

     “Don’t you think I should pack a few things?”

     “I do not see why. Sean has your measurements and can call ahead to have clothes waiting for you.”

     “Now wait one minute!” I growled, fiercely and bent closer to her face. “I am not for sale, so…”

     “Do not take that tone with me, Dear!” Jamie spat, slowly and just as heatedly if not a little bit more. “You may have me worshiping the ground you walk on, but I shall do whatever I wish to impress you. You say you are not for sale and I believe you, but I will not be denied showing you how much you mean to me. If you wish to yell and scream at me, then do so to your heart’s content, but I will not change my mind.”

     “So does this mean I’m being kidnapped?”

     “No, but if you wish to put me in handcuffs and make me scream out your name again as a compromise, I am willing to consider kidnapping you.”

     “You do know there are fine lines between infatuation, obsession, and crazed.”

     “I’m sure there is dear, but when you get to stalker you’ll almost be warm. Now, let us have a bite to eat, and then go horseback riding. I’ll be right back.”

     When she returned, she was carrying a large tray and nearly stumbled several times crossing the room.

     “Ah,” I called out, greatly frightened.

     “Would you move over please dear, this tray is heavy?”

     All I could do was reach over and take the tray from her before she spilled the thing all over me. I nearly choked when she quickly opened her…

     “And, where are your clothes?” I asked, unquestionably in terror.

     I had nodded off after she had left the room and thought the woman would at lease put more on her then the thin silk robe she had on when she left.

     “If that is what you wish,” she said, sadly and looked down at her feet.

     What in the hell had happened was my first thought, and my second was if I had gone mad? As I had told my captain, she wasn’t hard to look at, not hard at all.

     “Ah,” I choked.

     “Yes dear,” she said, eagerly as her head snapped up.

     Not knowing what to say, as if by some miracle I did, it wouldn’t have come out right anyway. I placed the tray on my lap and pulled back the covers on her side of the bed. She moved quickly and slid as close to me as possible without knocking over the tray.

     “Do you know what time it is?” I asked.

     “Does it matter?”

     “No, not really.”

     “Is it that you now wish to leave?” she asked, dejectedly and a bit ashamed. “I know I have… Are you still angry with me about what happened at the fundraiser? Please believe that I did not know he would show up and try to pick a fight with you.”

     “It wasn’t your fault,” I said, softly and hoped I sounded consoling instead of confused as hell.

     “I never knew he was capable of jealousy,” she pleaded, passionately. “If you will let me, I can make him penniless before the day is over as a compromise for his rudeness to you. Or if you would like, we can…”

     The woman was actually blushing. You would think being in bed, unclothed, and holding a conversation with her front uncovered wasn’t embarrassing enough. If you also throw in that they had only met the night before and had spoken to one another very little at the fundraiser, he felt like covering his chest and he was the guy. Well, I must have done or said something to cause for this to happen.

     All that was left for me to do was to apologize quickly, go down to the precinct, and pack up my things. I wonder if the docks are hiring night security guards. Of all the people to cross, there was always a shortage of body bags when she was involved.

     “I am sorry for how I… I think it would be best for me to go. I promise this will never happen again.”

     “Then you have not forgiven me?” she asked, clearly still ashamed.

     “I am sure none of this…”

     “Well, it means something to me,” she said, softly in a small timid voice. “If you will not tell me what I can do to… What do you wish for me to do so you will forgive me? I can give you…”

     “No,” I said, harshly and wished I had my gun in hand to have some iron to go with my foot I had just put in my mouth. “I mean, there is nothing to forgive.”

     “Then when can I see you again?”

     “I don’t know. You can call…”

     “I know I must seem like a loose woman to you,” she said, hastily to cut me off from saying more. “Is this the reason why you do not wish to see me again?”

     “No, that isn’t it at all.”

     “Then why?”

     “Don’t you think we come from two…?”

     “Do not hand me that drivel about different worlds,” she said, strongly. “I do not know what planet you are on, but I am here now and I do not wish you to leave.”

     “But, we barely know each other. Isn’t this going a little too fast?”

     “I know you enough that you like it when I scream out your name,” she giggled, brightly and placed a finger delicately on my lips. “And, you better stop calling me Greenleaf while I do so before it becomes a habit. I have a name you know. Since I’m sure it’s going to take my pilot some time to prepare for our trip, I would like to hear what would you wish to do after we have our meal?”

     “I haven’t got a clue,” I said, absentmindedly than wished I had kept my mouth closed.

     “I do,” she said, softly and moved even closer.

     When I felt her lips on mine, my eyes popped open and my head spun. Well, so much for breakfast. Not a morsel was touched.

     There was an excited knock at the bedroom’s double doors. I had heard politer knocks on a bathroom door of a fast-food restaurant where the soft drinks were for free. The abrupt change from complete silence to all out panic caused me to involuntarily jump, triggering me to hit my head on the headboard of the bed, and spilling her onto the floor from where she fell asleep lying on top of me. Once again, I had made a complete fool of myself, but at least I would remember this bit of stupidity.

     “My, are we not full of energy this morning,” she laughed, excitedly. “Let me see why we are being disturbed, and then I can…”

     “Will you be serious?” I growled.

     “I thought I was,” she giggled, slightly louder as she picked herself up off the bedroom’s floor and put on her robe. “Come,” she called, strongly to the doors.

     “Madame,” her butler, Sean called, excitedly as he rushed into the room. “I must apologize for the interruption, but this could not be avoided. I’ve just received a call from the office.”

     “What is it?” she snapped, angrily.

     Before Sean could form an adequate apology, Stutter took a swing at Janie’s butt and yanked the back of her robe harshly, sending her backwards. Her head turned as she now found herself sitting on the edge of the bed with a strange tingling sensation on her bottom and looked at him startled. She was about to ask him to do it again until she saw how angry he was, and quickly changed her tone. At that point the butler started swaying back and forward where he stood and looked to faint. Before he could fully become unconscious and have that familiar thump sound of a body hitting the ground ring out, one particular thought came to his mind, (There was a Santa Claus!).

     “I sincerely apologize for my harsh words to you Sean,” Jamie said, evenly. “What is so urgent that you need to disturb our moment alone?”

     “I know you and the Master were planning on visiting your ranch, but you have an important meeting this morning and…”

     “Tell them I shall arrive shortly,” she said, sadly with her head down.

     “Yes Madame. I shall inform your pilot that your trip is postponed for now.”

     This seemed the perfect time for me to make my escape and regroup before she placed her lips on me and prevent me from remembering my name… once again. Now that was one thought he should have left alone. She was far from hard to look at.

     “I think it would be best if we got dressed,” I chuckled. “It’s either that or the people you are going to meet will wonder why you are still in your robe and slippers. Besides, I have to get my tuxedo back to the store.”

     “That is no longer a concern, Sir,” Sean said. “I had your evening wear returned to the rental shop for you.”

     “And, what am I going to wear?”

     “I have several suits waiting for you to choose from, some basic styles of shirts, and footwear as well. I had also taken the liberty to have several styles of tuxedos commissioned so you will no longer have needed to rent.”

     “You WHAT!” I choked.

     “Of course, Sir. It was of little concern, and I took the liberty to lay out several dozen selections of socks and ties as well.”

     “Janie!” I growled, slowly.

     “As many tailors I keep on hand, I am sure one of them got your size correct. If not, it will take less time than the two of us to enjoy a cup of coffee for adjustments to be made.”

     “That’s not the point Janie.” I said, strongly.

     “Of course it is, Dear. Will you stop thinking I am trying to buy you,” she hissed, angrily back at me with some heat in her voice of her own. “You know this is not the case.” She looked towards Sean and smiled coldly, “Would you please leave us so the most honorable Detective can bellow at me in private and we can kiss and make up.”

     “Yes, Madam. Oh, I must ask. Sir, are you accompanying the madam to the office or…”

     “I’m going home,” I said, sharply. “That is if I can get a ride?”

     “But, you are having lunch with me?” Janie asked, softly pouting with her bottom lip sticking out and with her best sad kitten’s eyes looking up at me. “I can have a car and chauffeur at your…”

     “I think I can catch a cab,” I said, firmly with a low growl.

     “I will hear no such thing. What kind of….”

     “No,” I said, definitely a bit stronger than I meant to.

     “But, I have…”

     “No is no, Janie,” I said, clearly on the verge of shouting.

     “I shall personally see to this Madam,” Sean said, politely cutting off a possible argument before it happened. “It would make things simpler to get through security and insure the car is prepared properly for the Master’s comfort. I’m sure he would not wish to divert your attention from your discussion with the board.”

     “Now see here…,” I said, tightly holding back my anger.

     “My name is Sean, Sir.”

     “Sean, I can…”

     “Of course, Sir,” Sean said, politely cutting me off. “After you bathe and prepare yourself, I shall insure your clothing is waiting for your approval in the Madam’s dressing room. There will also be a wide variety of fragrances for you to choose and give the Madame opportunity to know your preferences. If you will excuse me Master and you as well Madame,” Sean said, sharply while nodding his head respectfully before showed himself out without saying another word.

     The door had barely closed before Janie dived forward and attacked me.

     “What are you doing woman!” I choked, utterly caught off guard and by how she had taken… control of the situation, I should’ve just tuned my head and cough.

     “I did say we had some making up to do,” Janie said, innocently in a deceptive voice, but with one hell of a mischievous party happening in her eyes.

     “I believed that was after I yelled at you first.”

     “First or second, I could never get that right. Now that I think about it. With this being my first time I have ever been in a wonderful situation like this, I must plead complete and total ignorance in this matter and beg for your forgiveness with another kiss. However, if you believe more is required, I am more than willing to indulge any condition you wish in compensation to cool your ire towards me. I would think quickly before I take matters into my own hands. Oh, my!” she giggled, happily. “What do we have here? I believe taking things into my own hands will suffice after all.”

     I knew this woman was going to be a problem. Not a serious one, but one nevertheless. All of a sudden her robe flew over my head and… As I had said more than once, she definitely wasn’t hard to look at.

- End of Sample Chapter -

3rd Place Winner is Fail to Remember.  Fail to Remember is the first book in the Detective Stutter Series. The book is a about John Stutter, one of New York City's top detectives who one day becomes of great interest to a ridiculously wealthy New York City socialite. Now the wealthy, the powerful, the famous, the infamous, and a few complete nut-jobs have their sights on having Detective Stutter as well. However, John Stutter has a thing for his captain, each woman who falls in love with him is murdered, and he is the last person to see them alive. Oh, and let's not forget, the murders always occurs after he experiences a blackout. Sometimes, being an amnesiac can be a lot of fun.

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