Friday's Caffeine #3

Are You Afraid of Criticism?

 by SD Tracy Harper

Criticism is something everyone has to face and deal with one day in their lives. It matters little what event(s), moment(s), or item(s) that presents itself for the attention from others, there shall be criticism.

A quote from Photographer and Author Steve Bloom

     “Great People Are Criticized. One thing you should keep in mind is how close prestige and criticism are. For example, have you ever disliked someone famous, all your friends seem to like? I think everyone has experienced this at one time or another. Perhaps you think the person is untalented or doesn’t deserve all the attention they’re getting. Whatever the reason, it irritates you that this person gets any attention at all.”

Any action you take to prove your point directly to the person who efforts you believe is unworthy (with proof or not) is a criticism. To be more precise, positive criticism shows that we are good, but negative criticism may shout that we are great.

There is absolutely no way to please everyone because there is someone only pleasure is not to be pleased. We call them the constant complainer or the arguer, for the sake of arguing or a person who take joy in trolling. No matter how much you show them the error of their ways or they were on the wrong end of a misunderstanding won’t change the outcome. No matter what you say, what you can show, or what is obvious even to these slow of thought, nothing will change their minds and attitudes. It is best to just focus on the two overall types of criticism.

1.       Positive Criticism

a.       We all want to be accepted and appreciated.  It is what everyone wants no matter if they wish to appear to be humble and unworthy of the admiration or not.

b.      It’s a wonderful source of validation that what we are doing, we are doing it right or better than even we had expected.

c.       It makes us feel good about ourselves (honestly).

2.       Negative Criticism

a.       Can be positive criticism as well if it is put forth to point out where there was a disconnect from the intended message, give an insight to help improve the quality of the work presented, and be valuable immediately and in the future.

b.      If given to mock, ridicule, or degrade an honest effort it is nothing but worthless noise and a waste of time.

c.       Can and is hurtful.

d.      Automatically arrives with well-respected awards , honors, and the death of anonymity with a final cost of innocence.

Unfortunately, there is no single tried and true methodology in dealing with a person’s fear of criticism, and this fact is the only truth on the subject. The sad reality of this topic is because of this fear of interaction it has truly deprived the world of marvels uncounted. During my (quick) study on this question I found a nice little gold nugget that I will end this article with. It’s a YouTube mini lecture on “4 keys to dealing with criticism” by Marie Folio.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwSU72bLEJc

My final thoughts on this subject are for those who are criticized is to do the best to your ability and learn from your past to make your future bright. For those who criticize, I shall say simply. If you don’t like something and can help make it better than do, if you don’t like something and don’t care who you harm, use your own effort to show what it should be. As the old saying goes, practice what you are preaching or become a teacher because you are incapable of doing. I hope you received some insight with this problem that is universal to everyone no matter who they are. 

Would you like to have your topic discussed? Would you like to get an opinion on something that bugging you? Have you ever wonder about what makes an author pull out their hair?  Well, let's sit down for a cup of TEA or a nice healthy shot of CAFFEINE.

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